Don’t Turn Me Into a Liar
I received two phone calls in three days, on the same subject, but from opposite sides of the coin. The call today was from a caregiver who had lost her husband to various illnesses and some dementia. She thanked me for helping her change her perspective on her husband’s behavior. To reprogram her mind from being aggravated at her husband’s behavior to understanding that, that was the best he could do under the circumstance. “I feel good about how I cared for him,” she said, “it was all about changing my attitude and seeing things differently.”
The other call came from a woman who was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. She was in a session that I presented in Kona, on the Big Island, at the health facility where she now lives. “I felt so good and inspired listening to you speak of treating dementia people with dignity and compassion,” she said. “If this was in store for me, I felt really good about being here with this disease.
“But,” she continued, “it’s not happening. I’m not being treated with dignity. I also watch the staff and they are very rude to other residents and they just don’t understand why we’re here. What you spoke to us about being treated with dignity , is not happening.”
This morning my mother and I began a story in the Honolulu Star/Advertiser on caregiving.
The complete story is posted by my publisher on my Facebook: http://www.facebook.com//FrancesKakugawa
It can also be found here:http://www.staradvertiser.com/newspremium/20130415_Program_gives_caregivers_tools_to_cope.html?id=202969511
I’m pleased that all who were interviewed for the story are on the same page , that monies must be spent on human resources on behalf of our loved ones who are living with Alzheimer’s and other dementia related diseases. The deliverance of nursing and medical skills must be based on the humanities.
I saw blind spots at the nursing facility where my mother resided in the late 90’s so I volunteered to train all staff members to integrate their skills knowledge with compassion, and to become aware of each client as a human being. To see how we have extended our circle of family to them for the care of our loved ones, with trust and commitment.
A month ago, I called the head nurse and was pleased to know, the list I had offered them on being humanistic nurses and aides, was still on the wall in their lounge and that list is still current today.
It can be done, so I’m hopeful that grant monies will be used to help us all learn what it means to be human.
Otherwise, that woman who had called me from that facility turns me into a fantasy story teller. I did promise her a rose garden.
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